Flavorless

Lately I've been very bored. When I hang out with my friends I'm not, but after it just becomes a memory and nothing feels like it has changed.

Lately when I eat the food is flavorless. I've had a PB and J some many times in my life that it doesn't tastes like anything anymore and if I'm lucky it tastes terrible. The few colors in my room are mashed as if becoming mashed potatoes. and it's cold with no welcoming into it.
When I watch a movie I realize it's the same story over and over again and it's hard to find a good movie anymore.
When I'm at home I don't really feel like we're a family just a bunch of people who now each other's names.

I'm not sure things just seem flavorless.

Fun

My BFF and I had a sleep over and it was lots of fun. We didn't really do much activities  but it was nice to hang out. We had only hung out twice since the end of summer and I was going crazy even though we sit next each other in school all most every day it still isn't the same. I missed hanging out with her and still do and I can't wait to again.

This a picture I had found roaming the internet and it reminds me of her.

Scary

It's scary at school these days. I feel like there is always a pair of eyes staring at the back of my head. When I turn around and scan the classroom it's always this one popular boy that has multiple girls liking him. I feels as though he is trying to make eye contact with me. And when he does for a slight second I look way and I still feel like he is watching me.

Some of My Art

Very few really look at my art, but some of my brother's high school friends came over and recognized my Bf's art. I am jealous and the jealousy annoys me, but I figured I could show some of it to people wiling to look at it.

Me as a elf

Nora (A dark elf that might go into my book)

Black Canary (Dinah DC Character)

My first one perspective drawing

A card I made for my BF's birthday of us

Weird Feel

When we actually talk to each other and we're having fun then I say some little thing and she takes it the wrong way. When she talks to my after that she sounds like she is blaming me for my honesty. I feel like I say something and then she regurgitates it. I have a feeling something big is going to snap us apart like a pair of chopsticks.

And I think I have a crush, but one I can't confess in less to my parents. Because I know that if I tell some people that I know they won't look at me the same way and I will be very depressed.

Wish

There is always a moment in your life or more where you think...

I wish I was better at sketching ,drawing, inking

I wish I was better at being open, not shy, cheerful all the time

I wish I was better at writing, poems, story's, emotions

I wish I was I open about singing, dancing, touching others, and not shying away from it

And so many other things.

But it takes awhile to get used to your surroundings who won't hurt your feelings if you express them.
I haven't spoken to anyone about whats been happening for the last month and I don't think I can verbally speak it that is why I have a blog. It makes it easier to speak out, and I can't worry about what  others think
I want to be honest in a nice way.

So for the very first time my parents fought and they have been together for 5 years so it was good for them to get it out, but I'm happy I don't have parents who argue all the time.
Also I feel that something will happen between my dear friend also known as B.F.F. and that it will happen soon. I give my honest opinion to her about her art and she is truly amazing when it comes to art, but if it's just a little negative I feel really bad and I would rather not lie to her.


I am really glad that there are some people out there who are willing to read my writing and understand it's hard to verbally speak out rather then writing or tying.
I just wish that the ones I talk to all the time would also read it too because part of the reason I made this blog is to make them understand better from my point of view.

I thank all who read my blog even if you don't like.

Mix

I feel as if so many people want to be around me this school year. But my dear friends don't want to be near me most the time. Two girls in my class that love comics and are best friends are so fun. One of them is like a ninja and she is so funny she just randomly does funny things.


Ever since I turned 14 I feel like everyone has been watching me more mainly the boys. My mom said it's because I'm getting older and and that I'm not a Mayflower which means I'm not a newbie anymore.


I slept over at a different girl's house with 2 other girls from or class. It really fun we tried on her really cute dresses and went in her pool.